From time to time I like to have other experts "guest" on my blog. Today I want to introduce you to someone very special and her advice on loving the self, and yes loving the skin your in.
Her name is Allana Pratt and she understands, as she has dealt with the same skin issues and the emotions revolving them as we have. Enjoy and be sure to comment if you like this post!
Learn More About Allana Pratt Here
Are You At Peace WITH Your Skin... & IN Your Skin?
Age 16: Had a bad bought with acne on my shoulders and chest in high school. Hid it most the time but three times a week at dance class I was ashamed. Couldn't get out of my spinning head.
Age 22: Quit college and moved to Tokyo and some magical combination of a new diet, new facial products, being away from my fighting parents and feeling empowered from within cleared it all up as I graced runways, backpacked through Asia and modeled on commercials.
Age 33: I thought I was DONE!!! Did you hear me say DONE?!!! Then in one year my mom died, I got pregnant, got a divorce, lost my house and ended up in debt. The acne was back and at the end of each day I tried to squeeze the puss out of my face when I really needed to heal the sadness, anger and grief out of my heart.
Age 41: I meet and interviewed the amazing Chris Gibson. Wow. Talented, passionate man on a mission. Real, has integrity, and making a huge difference. While I haven't even started using Ginalé (can't wait) as I write this message to you, after our first two talks, I have tweaked my diet, started exfoliating and I'm seeing a difference.
I've also gone inside to see where my stress is still an addiction. Did I say addiction?
You see I'm a Relationship Coach and I teach people how to have thriving relationships and flourishing families through having healthy intimate relationships and being AT PEACE IN YOUR SKIN.
I know all about our survival mechanisms, our sabotaging behaviors that are honestly addictions in our brain to get the hormonal hit that occurred waaaaaaaaaaaay back when we were 5'ish...
Our mind and good sense might say 'let go' of that toxic relationship or destructive behavior... an addictive pull is asking us to create that pattern of stress in our lives over and over again to feel 'normal', to feel 'relief" while it's destroying our capacity to have healthy intimate relationships with ourselves, with others... ultimately with Source.
So given we can't see our own blind spots... I was grateful for Chris being my catalyst to have another look at what stress of mine is still around that could be contributing to me STILL having acne 8 years after my son is born and mom has died?
My blind spot?
That I'm trying to look good. (Well obviously covering up my zits for the time being, but I mean on the inside!)
I'm trying to look good to others and to me that I have a workable co-parenting relationship my son's father because after all for goodness sake, I'm a Relationship Coach!
My son's birthday party was today and I'm pretending to get along with his Dad and I don't. He always seems to push my buttons and I always seem to step right into the trap.
While we may get along one day in the future, the truth right now is that what's healthiest for me and makes me the best mom for my son is to not have regular communication with his Dad.
I keep biting and keep getting manipulated... but really it's ME engaging and giving my power away!!
He must sense how hard I try to look good and get along for our son... or trying to fearfully avoid looking like a crappy relationship coach and he enjoys toying with me!
Or he may not even be conscious of this at all!!! I'm just there as a victim attracting that which I'm most afraid of! Law of Attraction, sister!
So if I was totally honest, I do get a lot of juice out of complaining about him. Kind of gross but it's my identity. As sad as this sounds, my life would be boring if there wasn't another situation to overcome and suffer through.
There'd be nothing left to prove or conquer if I just stopped arguing with him and just communicated through emails here and there and got on with my life. I mean I even have a mediator I can call to help us if we need support, yet I just don't call.
Thus, I'm busted! I'm creating my own stress! What if this is continually keeping me breaking out?
And so I'm declaring an official end to this addiction now! Whew.
Truth sets us free (even though it first pisses us off.) And so, amazing new friend, I ask you to have a peek-a-boo at your own life.
Is there a situation that you consistently complain about?
Is there someone who always pushes your buttons but you keep going back for more?
Is there someone who, if you never got to have the last word, or never got to tell another about what they did... you just had to go cold turkey and shut up... that it would feel like going into rehab!?
If so, what if that was a contributing factor to not only your skin's health but your heart's health... to your inner peace... to your radiance as a woman and confidence as a man?
What if you could shift your attention away from where you drain your power and toward an act of self empowerment and some tender forgiveness?
Well, here's how I do it:
Step 1: Forgive yourself for it all, as you're ALWAYS doing your best.
Step 2: Forgive them too, believe it or not, even if it's malicious behavior, they are truly doing their best, too.
Step 3: When the 'hit' comes to go for the addiction to 'bite'... instead do something else that is self loving...
A. Move the energy: Have a really good cry or hit the living day lights out of a pillow.
b. Listen: Once the feeling has past, listen. What really wants to emerge through you... what insight, what capacity, what solution, what alternative for a more peaceful life?
c. Celebrate: Put on a fabulous song dance or rock out in the car to celebrate your insight and willingness to STOP the sabotaging behavior and instead take full responsibility for your life.
Bonus*** Next time you go for a walk, imagine the Sun thinks YOU are the Hot One because I think you're completely delicious.
So even if this article helped only a wee bit because you're relationships are pretty stellar... we know it only takes one more degree to make water boil... and perhaps this one last bit of insight could tip you into a dimension of joy, bliss, freedom and empowerment beyond your dreams... this is what I wish for you.
In fact, that's why I'm so honored to know great men like Chris because I feel buoyed up by his message and claiming of living life fully.
I say make today, seriously, as delicious as you can stand it!
On Air Talent
Author, Coach & Speaker